11 weeks!

That's all.  Just wanted to post.

2 more weeks til my next doctor's appointment.  Hopefully I'll get a glimpse of Baby Bubble, but for sure a heartbeat.




P.S.  More dreams last night.  Some very vivid and wacky dreams.  But the only reference to Baby was that I was picking through baby clothes, I'm not sure where they came from, but I was passing up anything girly.  I had to find only by clothes.

Obviously I know it's just a dream, but I would like to believe my subconscious is telling me this is a baby boy.  :)

Dreams....

I pushed this off as long as I could, and now Im breaking down and writing.  yesterday morning, I had several dreams in a row.  short little snippets of things that I mostly didn't rememeber....  except the one I couldn't get out of my head.  i don't remember a lot of details, but someone was trying to hurt my baby.  no regard for my life either.  i woke up in a panic and felt sick to my stomach.  my whole belly was aching.  i had tears in my eyes and my throat felt raw from screaming.  even after just waking, i had no real concept of who or what the dream was about, but i was scared for the baby...

i got up and tried to go about my morning routine, hoping to put the dream behind me.  i told myself over and over that is was JUST a dream, and that everything was fine.  but i just couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong.  no matter what i did, no matter what i tried to eat, i just felt like i was going to throw up. 

so without really thinking too much about it, i got on the computer and sent an email to the clinic.  i explained about my dream and feeling weird, and asked if i could get in for someone - anyone - to see if baby was ok.  i got a call just about 20 minutes later and they were able to get me in later that afternoon.

then all hell broke with my daughter in Texas.  she moved down there about 2 years ago because her mom and dad were fighting and she felt trapped in the middle.  she said she hated being treated like a child and wanted to be on her own.  so she moved down with her oldest brother and his family.  she got her GED, started working, and then got her own place.  but she ended up getting herself in over her head...  we had told her a few months ago that if she needed to come home, we would come get her.  we had our tax return coming and would be able to work it out.  but she dragged her feet and attempted to make a go of it again, but just dug herself deeper.  so now we can't help....  and a big part of me says that since she out herself where she is, she needs to pull herself up and out. 

but she is doing what she can, with a little help from her mom and her dad (my husband) and coming home.

so i went to my appointment, with my girls in tow because Wynter refused to let me leave the house without her.  got there right on time, but had to sit and wait, which always cranks up my anxiety.  but finally they called me back, checked my vitals, and didn't even really ask about why i was there.  the computer said it, so i didn't have to try and explain.  and again i had to wait for the PA to come in.  but she finally did, and was very cool.  she got right to it, and started looking for Bubble. 

this little one is a mover!  every time she would get a lock on him, he would swim away.  we got a few beats and he was gone.  so she asked me if it was ok that we keep looking, until we could get a good read.  i said of course!  each little beat made me indescribably happy....  and finally she cornered him and we got a strong steady heartbeat.  i felt so much at ease, and all of the tension went right out of me.

baby heart beat was 162. 

and my paranoia was relieved.

until next time?

First OB appointment

I absolutely love the clinic I go to.  My doctor and her nurse are just amazing.

So I had my first appointment today.  Typical of me, I peed before we left the house, so I had almost nothing to leave for a sample...  Tammy the nurse came and called me back.  She went through all of the usual information.  She was charmed by Wynter, who was in a good frame of mind for the beginning.  She told me to get changed, because we were gonna do a pap and pelvic exam, and then an ultrasund to check on baby.  Well, Dr Jayne didnt want to do anything internal today, because she didnt want to cause any bleeding or spotting and have me freak out.  Fine by me!

Well, Wynter got upsey because she was yelled at for touching the ultrasound machine.  Then she cried because another nurse came and took the ultrasound machine.  But she calmed down and then the doctor came in, with the ultrasound machine.  She did an external ultrasound to check on baby - squirming and kicking like crazy!  But no picture, cuz the machine was out.  Which was ok, because it was just a blob...

She got me cleaned up and then talked me through the "plan" for the pregnancy.  She said that any time I had a concern about anything, all I had to do was come in.  She would see me every month in the beginning.  She wanted to test me early for blood sugar, and test me often for blood sugar.  Starting at 28 weeks, she wants bi-weekly stress tests.  Every month an ultrasound.  And again, if I needed any reassurance in between anything, just to call.

She said during my next appointment, she would do the pap test and exam.  She wanted a blood sugar test and all of the other blood work.  (instead of putting Wynter through the trauma of watching Mommy get poked).

So all in all, not much happened.  But I saw Baby Bubble, everything looks good, and I know my doctor is right on the ball with me.  :)

Next appointment is scheduled for July 2.